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Top Ten Tuesdays: I Still Love You, Roger
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Just a day after BFF Dandy Andy met with the law-makin' folk, Rog had a 5-hour sit-down with Congress today.* He was under oath, of course, and for the 6th time denied any juice use of any kind ever in the history of the universe (the other 5, in case you've lost track, were: the initial statement after Mitchy-boy's report became public, the YouTube-esque video on his website, his appearance on 60 Mins, the rabidly emotional press conference in Houston, and then the defamation lawsuit he slapped on McNameanie). Other than saying that it was "great" to be able to tell them that he didn't use PEDs (denying the allegations has officially become his full-time job and passionate hobby), the Rogster didn't give us many details about what the hell they talked about for five goddamn hours.

As I've said a buncha times now, the vehement-ness of all this denial leads the ol' YC to seriously doubt the veracity Mitchell's claim. Even if Roger is as dumb as a brick - and I have yet seen the results of his SAT or IQ tests, so I can't attest to his intelligence at this time - one would assume that he would have some smarty-pants lawyers and PR peeps at his disposal to tell him to shut his trap and quit the denial crusade if he were lying, no?

To be honest, I have found myself not only starting to believe the Rog, but not even caring if he IS lying. I just like him too much. It's shamefully uncontrollable.


Top Ten Reasons I Don't Really Care If Roger Juiced

10) The passionate denials of steroid use! Such dedication! The devotion to the cause!
9) 2 words: Cingular commercial.
8) He gave back that car the Yanks gave him upon his "retirement".
7) The Waldman-hysteria-inducing announcement of his imminent return to the Yanks in '07.
6)"I wish there was a bar I could send opposing teams to and get them hammered or something — I could tell my buddies in New York to leave their places open or something. Playing for the Yankees, guys come at you extremely hard. I have to be ready or I'll be embarrassed.'' I've had similar thoughts before... "if only I could get my boss hammered nightly so I can come in late all the time!"
5) His fine acting performance in a Simpsons episode during which he clucked - quite believably! - like a chicken.
4) 7 Cy Youngs.
3) He gave all 4 of his kids names starting with "K". This is so sickeningly cute I kind of like it.
2) Anyone that angers Kyle Farnsworthless is good in my book.
1) The rarity of an old man being so good at something. Anything, really.

* Again... it's just so wonderful to see that our ever-vigilant government is working hard to solve the ails of society. While they're chattin' it up with athletes, I'm sitting over here shelling out thousands of dollars for school, hundreds for health insurance, and the entire US population is in knee-deep in debt.


Read last week's Top Ten: Happy Memories From the 2007 Season



Labels: ,

posted by Yankees Chick @ Tuesday, February 05, 2008  
4 Comments:
  • At 12:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    He keeps denying it so he much be telling the truth. Forget his intelligence, what's your IQ?

     
  • At 10:35 AM, Blogger Yankees Chick said…

    forget my intelligence...

    pop quiz: are you familiar with the term "sarcasm"?

     
  • At 10:08 AM, Anonymous Fellow Rog Fan said…

    I'm with you YC.

    I know some of those on the list were jokes (unlike anonymous, apparently), but I got the gist. I am still rooting for Rog!

     
  • At 10:50 AM, Anonymous Casey said…

    You forgot to mention that he keeps his HGH in the family - what with the wifey get in on the act - classic stuff.

    "Hey hunny - we got dis photo shoot comin'. Whaddya say you get all buff before donning da bikini?"

    http://ccww.wordpress.com

     
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