There's no doubt that the Girardino has some big cleats (see what I did there? Hilarious) to fill as he steps into his first year at the helm of the team. Anyone that takes over for a man with such an impressive career as our dear Torre is bound to endure extreme scrutiny and elevated expectations, and those expectations are elvetated to Mount Everest levels (sidenote: did any of y'all see the episode of "I Shouldn't Be Alive" on Discovery Channel about the dudes that got stuck in a blizzard on their journey up the mountain?! God Greg Graffin I love that show), because of the recent failures to make it to championship-ville.
Yes, Girardi's got his work cut out for him. Can he handle the job as well as Torre did? Will his different managerial style prove to be just what the doctor ordered or aggravate the players who aren't accustomed to a fired-up leader? Let's take a gander at how they stack up against each other in various categories. Like "Whose Line is it Anyway", the points don't matter, just like your vote in Florida.
Managerial Record:
Torre: 2067-1770 (.539) Points: +40,000 Girardi: 78-84 (.481) Points: +12,888
Dugout Look:
Torre: Stone-faced. Points: +17 Girardi: Smirky, somewhere between amused and disgusted. Points: -86
Reaction to positive events:
Torre: Tears. Points: +4 Girardi: Slightly less smirky. Points: +23
Reaction to negative events:
Torre: Lack of emotion. Points: -256 Girardi: Fury. Points: +67
Attractiveness:
Torre: I'm sorry. Points: -4,000 Girardi: Not my type. Points: -100
Response to controversial calls:
Torre: Slow walk up to the umpire, where he shall have a calm discussion. May occassionally his psuedo-anger to escalate to a near-boiling point, but facial respection remains unchanged. Points: -68 Girardi: Get in ump's face. Holler. Points: +2,835
Number of pitchers destroyed by overuse:
Torre: 230,982,340,981,890 Points: -8,000 Girardi: 1,398,234,098 Points: -8,110 (since he did it just one year)
Relationship with owner:
Torre: A tad rocky, what with the threats of getting fired every year. Points: -213 Girardi: Not so good. Fought openly with Jeffrey Loria, kindly telling him to "shut the fuck up." Points: +2,050
Spring Training routine:
Torre: Sip some green tea and cool his heals in dugout. Points: -97 Girardi: Run sprints with the boys, pitch some BP, rally the troops. Points: +2,500
Dedication to the Yankees:
Torre: 12 years of service, remaining loyal despite threats of firing. Points: +3,613 Girardi: Four years on the team as a player, a year of broadcasting experience, and gave up the chance to manage for another team in '07 in favor of working for YES in hpes of landing the managerial gig this year. Points: +1,001
Total Points:
Torre: 31,005 Girardino: 13, 068
Well there you have it folks, a thoroughly researched and scientific comparison that doesn't add up to much (stupid obvious pun 100% intended). The question remains, though: who do you think is the better fit? Vote in the poll over in the good ol' sidebar! Labels: haha...ha. |
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Very funny entry. Like the whole "Whose Line" angle on the analysis. Keep up the good work.
I sent you that email about restructuring the playoffs last year. Feel free to use that as an idea for a later entry.