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Vocabulary Lesson: Pavano
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
After Pavano's latest injury - he busted some ribs when his seatbelt tightened too much during a minor car crash - I decided its time we reevaluate what Pavano means to the Yankees and what "Pavano" means to us everyday wordsmiths.

Pavano

Perhaps there is a curse upon him?

Pa-va-no [Puh-VAH-no]

Noun.

  1. A chronically injured baseball player: Carl Pavano has been a pavano for most of his time with the Yankees.
  2. A money pit requiring millions of dollars and offering little return: Wow, this old fixer-upper house we bought sure is turning out to be a pavano- we've been working on it for years and it's still not habitable!
  3. An unwanted long-term commitment: I had to sign a lease for my apartment; it’s a total pavano since I can’t move for a year even though I found a cheaper, more attractive place to live.

Verb

  1. To injure oneself in a strange, unconventional manner: I pavanoed when I tripped over a pile of cotton balls, fell into a large trampoline, and catapulted onto the roof of my dog’s house; I broke my left leg, 3 ribs and my right pinky finger.
    Bird flu...T-10 days till Pavano adds this to his injury list
  2. To disappoint people; not live up to expectations: I did not want to pavano, so I showed up to work early on my first day and worked late on a special assignment.
  3. To avoid manual labor at any cost, including inflicting injuries on oneself to disqualify one from performing said labor: Jimmy was sick of his tough job as a carpenter, so he pavanoed by intentionally contracting avian flu.


Add those to your personal Websters.

Labels: , ,

posted by Yankees Chick @ Wednesday, August 30, 2006  
18 Comments:
  • At 12:22 PM, Blogger MikeyBronx said…

    You're the funniest fucking girl on the planet.

    This is some of your best work yet.

     
  • At 3:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    this is hilarious AND true! which makes it sad as well. (sigh)

     
  • At 4:54 PM, Anonymous josh said…

    haha this was pure awesome.

     
  • At 3:51 AM, Anonymous YH said…

    Could you be my English tutor? I don't want to pavano my parents......hum, is it correct to use the word as a tran.verb?

     
  • At 4:20 AM, Anonymous WangFans from Taiwan said…

    haha...you are so cute a girl...
    It's fucking fun.

    Maybe it can be also adjective and mean a person who is stupid and fool around all day .

    Ex:
    1.My brother is a pavano guy.
    2.The pitcher is getting more and more pavano

     
  • At 7:50 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Vocabulary Lesson 2: Pavano can also be written as "Painvano"

     
  • At 9:29 AM, Blogger Yankees Chick said…

    hahhaha "painvano". i like that one :)

     
  • At 11:08 AM, Blogger Don Ballgame said…

    Pavano could be used as a verb (as in to extort money). Example. Carl Pavano is still pavanoing his check from the Yankees.

     
  • At 5:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Very clever,I got a good laugh out of it. I guess a lot of people are getting a good laugh out of Pavano these days.

    You can also equate Pavano to fine crystal - handle him too hard and he breaks in your hand.

    Pavano as a fine wine? Have him hang around rehabbing for too long and you get a taste of vinegar in your mouth as you see him re-injure himself and your investment going down the drain.

    Pavano is definitely a living example of Murphy's Law. I actually feel sorry for the guy.

     
  • At 11:10 AM, Blogger Charles Slavik, CPT*D said…

    he's got a long way to go b4 he can pull off a wilson alvarez, whose injuries didn't keep him from hoisting every Krispy Kreme donut in the Tampa Bay area. If he has the same affliction he should come off the DL roughly about the time his contract runs out, leaving enough time to audition for ""greater fools".

     
  • At 6:00 PM, Blogger Brooklyn Frank said…

    it's getting to the point where he's the next hideki i-rob-u.

     
  • At 4:54 AM, Blogger beisbolct said…

    still laughing from this

     
  • At 6:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You rule! you got posted to the Yankee NG by the way

     
  • At 12:01 PM, Anonymous singledd said…

    Excellent! Funny! Thoughtful! Wow, a good looking chick with brains!

     
  • At 9:19 AM, Anonymous Carl Pavano said…

    Please stop this madness! I'm a man dammit, and I have feelings. Cut me, do I not bleed?

     
  • At 7:41 AM, Blogger Ruby K said…

    This post was awesome. Thank you for putting a name to pava... pain.

     
  • At 10:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Oh....my...god...I think a little milk game out of my nose I laughed so hard. Funny shit...you need to pick on the fugly "swimsuit model" next...it just keeps getting better and better!

     
  • At 7:53 AM, Blogger Bald Headed Geek said…

    I'm a Red Sox fan (sorry), but grew up in Montreal as an Expos fan. So, I harbour a hatred of Carl Pavano that borders on the pathological, given his non-performance for Montreal after the Expos decided that it would be a GOOD idea to trade Pedro Mertinez for him (argh!!!!!).

    This list of definitions was absolutely hysterical; thanks for a much-needed laugh! :-)

     
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